Uncle Bonsai - Boys Want Sex in the Morning

Name: Uncle Bonsai
Album: Boys Want Sex in the Morning
Year:1986
Style: Folk, Comedy
Similar Bands: Pianosarus, Andrew Sisters, Roches, Dr. Demento, Ed's Redeeming Qualities
"One-Word" Review: Witty Jovial Acoustic Harmonized Folk
Based Out Of: Seattle, Wa
Label: Freckle Records

Cover, Record, Lyrics & Notes

Back, Record, Lyrics

Boys Want Sex in the Morning (1986)

1. Send My Body Home 3:30
2. Isaac's Lament 3:50
3. In It for the Children 3:29
4. I Want a Man 1:30
5. Fat Boys 3:48
6. Silent Night 5:17 /
7. Don't Put it in Your Mouth 3:53
8. Boys Want Sex in the Morning 3:28
9. Heartache 4:40
10. Billboard Love 2:58
11. Lois Lane 3:55
12. Cheerleaders on Drugs 2:47
13. The Star-Spangled Banner 2:10

Album Rating (1-10): 5.5

Members & Other Bands:

• Arni Adler - Vox (Christine Lavin, Linda Waterfall)
• Ashley (Eichrodt)  Kristen - Vox (Christine Lavin)
• Andrew Ratshin - Vox, Guitar (Electric Bonsai Band, Mel Cooleys, Christine Lavin, David Roth)
• Larry Nefzger - Producer, Engineer
• Dan Mortensed - Live Sound
• Karen Moskowitz - Cover
• Tom Scworer - Layout
• Sam Atwater - Insert
• Linda Newman - Insert
• Backstage - Live Venue

Unknown-ness: Never heard of this band. This album is quite perplexing. It screams everything i'd like in an indie, hipster band...provocative album title, two girls & one guy band make up, cool kitschy indie cover and back photo, almost like a goofy & colorful Belle & Sebastian spread. But this is a live recording, so with out knowing their catalogue, does this capture tracks from previous albums, or is this one of their first releases, and it just works better live...also, only Ratshin plays guitar, so is the album just guitar and vocals? No bass, drums, or key/synth? My preconceived notion about the album is that I'll like it a lot as just enough mix of juvenile humor and fun indie pop melodies.

Album Review: One guitar and two or three angelic voices comprises the music for UB, but throw in high-brow toilet humor and witty envelope pushing topics, you have a folk band that could also be considered anti-folk with its lack of naivety. The lofty music and complex harmonies give the surface appearance of a simple jovial folk act. While it is interesting and captivating at first, this is not the sort of album that holds my interest and I would not come back to for multiple listens. 

They had two basic periods of activity, 1981 - 1988, and then 1998 - present, where they have still been playing out over the past couple years with one personnel change: Kristen is no longer part of the band since 2007. This is the second of three albums from the first period: two of which were live recordings. The trio was formed in Seattle, but all went to Bennington College in VT. 

Stand Out Track: In It For the Children

Links:
Spotify Full Album + 2 bonus tracks
Wiki

Discogs

Allmusic
Website
10 lb fiddle 2018 show
Seattle Folklore Society 2020 show

Facebook

Crazy Joe and the Variable Speed Band - Eugene

Name: Crazy Joe and the Variable Speed Band
Album: Eugene
Year: 1981
Style: Humor, Disco, Novelty
Similar Bands: Ween (in a bad way), Was (Not Was), MECO, Ray Stevens, Rick Dees
"One-Word" Review: problematic novelty island disco rock
Based Out Of: NYC
Label: Polygram, Casablanca Records & Filmworks

Cover, Record

Record, Back

Eugene (1981)

1. Eugene 4:11 (single)
2. Buzz Me 2:47
3. Gay Ranchero 4:10
4. You 3:23
5. Ugga Ugga Boo 4:25/
6. Little Puffies 4:21
7. Ice Cream 2:58 (single)
8. Stranded in the Jungle 3:26
9. Madam Palm 3:11
10. Blow Up 1:40

Album Rating (1-10): 4.0

Members & Other Bands:

• "Crazy Joe" Renda - Vox, Keys, Producer (Country Cousins, Sherwoods, Alex Parche, Chip Taylor, Stoney Edwards, Bum Bar Bastards)
• Kat McCord - Vox (Fabulour Rhinestones, David Sanborn Band, Guy & Pipp Gillette)
• John Regan - Bass, Musical Arrangement (Frehly's Comet, Ace Frehly, Peter Frampton, Chip Taylor, Wendy Waldman, Lisa bade, Diane Richards, Bowie & Jagger, Rolling Stones, Billy Idol, John Waite, Bonnie Tyler, Michael Monroe, Robin Trower, David Lee Roth, Brad Absher, John Phillips, Rob Arthur, Four by Fate, High Priest, Henning Hallqvist)
• Ed Monteleone - Guitars, Musical Arrangement (Peter Frampton)
• Claude Lehenaff - Drums, Percussion (Frankie & The Knockouts)
• Rob Sabino - Organ, Piano, Synth (Frehly's Comet, Joined Forces, Simms Bros Band, Nile Rodgers, Ace Frehly, Robert Cotter, Ashford & Simpson, Chic, Norma Jean, Sister Sledge, Peter Frampton, Debbie Harry, Odyssey, Blotto, Fonzi Thornton, Michael Gregory, Bernard Edwards, Paul Simon, Bowie, Diane Richards, Madonna, Bryan Adams, Richie Scarlet, Cartoons, Rosanne Cash, Power Station, EG Daily, Mick Jagger, Jeff Beck, Rodney Crowell, Matthew Sweet, Laurie Anderson, Michael Monroe, Terri Gonzalez, Larry Neil, Art Garfunkel, Mick Jones, Todd Rundgren, Carly Simon, Johnny Mathis)
• Diane Scanlon - Backing Vox (Univ of Bridgeport Jazz Rock Ensemble, Felix Cavaliere, Guy & Pipp Gillette, Siji)
• Ace Frehley - Syndrum, Co-Producer (Frehly's Comet, Kiss, For Love Not Lisa, Gene Simmons, Wendy O Williams, Criss, ESP, Still Wicked, Richie Scarlet, Kathy Valentine, Jam Pain Society, Ken Sharp)
• John Platania - Guitar Effects (Prof. Louie & the Crowmatrix, Caledonia Soul Orch, Giants, Chip Taylor, John Prine, Van Morrison, Gary Kuper, Don Cooper, Genya Ravan, Sam Leopold, Randy Newman, Stony Edwards, Gary Windo, Martha Velez, Dean Batstone, Gathering Field, Children of Earth, Greg Kroll, Guy Davis, MJ Nelson, Kendel Carson, Billy Vera, Evie Sands)
• Chris Cassone - Backing Vox, Talk Box, Engineer 
• Mike Hunt - Sax (Billy Blacktooth)
• Gary Axelbank - Radio Announcer
• Dennis Kaplan - Mgmt
• John Nagy - Mixing
• Greg Calbi - Mastering
• Richard Wexler - Photo
• Stephanie Zuras - Design
• Bob Heimall - Art Direction

Unknown-ness: Never heard of this band. Looks like a basic power pop or pub rock band who likes to have a good time (see: guy tugging pizza out of a dog's mouth with his mouth)

Album Review: This entire album is absolutely horrible. Musically, it is OK, mostly leans toward disco,  and when the female vocals are isolated, it can be enjoyable. But each song employs comical vocals or effects, some of which are not very PC sounding, and most of the time, not very musical...take the immigrant, for whom, English is not his first language on "Eugene," or the alien rock band obsessed with underaged girls on "Little Puffies," or the homosexual vocal inflection in "Gay Ranchero." Even on the best track "Ice Cream," which starts out like a nice female r&b pop number with some fun synth energy. It is hampered by the sedated, monotone male speaking voice placed jarringly over some verse and backing the lead chorus. This vocal is the main vocal across the whole record, most of the time seeming more like a failed sketch comedy skit than a musical endeavor. 

The only pop appeal is that Ace Frehley had a hand in this band & it's "popularity." This is his first official work non related to Kiss. He co-produced and is featured on the single "Eugene." Other than that, Joe Renda made a name for himself as a producer more than a performer.

Stand Out Track: Ice Cream

Links:
Youtube full album
Discogs
Allmusic
Kissmonster
101.5 WPDH
The Stranger
Rate your Music
105.7 The Hawk

Blowfly - Rappin', Dancin', and Laughin'

Name: Blowfly
Album: Rappin', Dancin', and Laughin'
Year:1980
Style: Rap / Hip Hop
Similar Bands: Grandmaster Flash, Kurtis Blow, Two Live Crew, Afroman, Sugarhill Gang, Kool Keith, ODB
"One-Word" Review: vulgar old school rap
Based Out Of: Georgia / West Palm Beach, FL
Label: TK Productions, Weird World

Cover, Record

Record, Back

Rappin', Dancin', and Laughin' (1980)

1. Convoy 7:15
2. Blowfly Vs. Darth Vader 7:40
3. Cricka 5:00 /
4. The Incredible Fulk 8:40 (single)
5. The Word Game 6:00
6. The Insects Theme 4:00

Album Rating (1-10): 7.0

Members & Other Bands:

• Blowfly/Clarence Reid - Writer, Producer, Vox (Clarence Reid & the Delmiras, Betty Wright, Sam & Dave, Bobby Byrd and KC & Sunshine Band, Helene Smith, Paul Kelly, Gwen McRae, Flea, 2 Live Crew, Deep City Band, Palmerforce Two, Funky Party Band, Miami, Le Coffret Ideal Blaxploitation, many)
• Freedy Stonewall - Recording, Mixing
• Marc Vaughn - Cover Photo
• Rob Vaugn - Art Direction

Unknown-ness: Never heard of Blowfly. Although most of what seemed envelope pushing in the 80's would seem more common place, the hype behind the sexually tinged name and the "X-Rated" classification on the cover & back make me think this is going to be some juvenile, suggestive hip hop music with basic beats and lots of lyrics about the singer himself. Especially interested to see the take on Blowfly vs. Darth Vader...is he posing as the hero, up against the villain? 

Album Review: The album is 80's old-school hip hop with familiar, laid back bass lines and guitar hooks and more talking in skits rather than straight up rapping over the music. But the lyrics are quite vulgar and raunchy; talking about dick size and hard sex, with "fuck" used ad nauseum. Unfortunately, there are no parodies of popular tunes here, as that is what Blowfly made his name for.

His nickname was earned from his grandmom, called him "worse than a blowfly" when he'd sing explicit parodies of radio hits like "Come on baby, and suck my dick (do the twist)" for money on a farm where he worked. He had natural musical skills, as he was an accomplished, renown song writer in his day job as a staff songwriter at TK Records, working with Betty Wright, Sam & Dave, Bobby Byrd and KC & Sunshine band. His mixed style of soul, funk & Caribbean helped coin the term "The Miami Sound." He was also a pioneer in "Soul Talking," the direct predecessor to rap, and might have self-pressed the first rap record in 1964 with a rough version of "Blowfly's Rapp" . Because of that, had to use the stage name Blowfly to protect his integrity. He was one of the first musicians to perform masked, and his gross parodies earned him legal trouble and record store bans (first artist ever?), which eventually led to him selling all his rights to his music in 2003. But in 2005, he signed to Jello Biafra's Alternative Tentacles label. His later career saw a couple more albums and international tours and even had a documentary "The Weird World of Blowfly" in 2010. But his career was a huge influence to many rap and hip hop stars on top of his material being highly sampled. in He passed away in Jan 2016, just before his final album came out. On a side note, his daughter, Tracy Reid played in the WNBA.

Stand Out Track: Convoy

Links:
Wiki

Discogs

Allmusic

Saustex website

Facebook

rollingstone obit

NPR obit

NYTimes obit
Rate your music
Reggieslive
Vulture

Ponderosa Stomp

Brooklyn Vegan obit

Surf Punks - My Beach

Name: Surf Punks
Album: My Beach
Year: 1980
Style: Punk, Rock
Similar Bands: Dead Milkmen, Surf MC's, Ramones
"One-Word" Review: Silly Juvenile Surf-Topical Tunes
Based Out Of: Malibu, CA
Label: Epic, CBS

Cover, Record

Back, Record

My Beach (1980)

1. My Beach 1:48
2. My Wave 2:27
3. Teenage Girls 3:06
4. Shoulder Hopper 2:42
5. The Dummies 2:32
6. Beer Can Beach 1:54
7. Surfer's Nightmare 1:43
8. I Live For the Sun 2:17 (Sunrays cover)
9. Meet me At the Beach 2:44 /
10. Big Top 2:46
11. Somebody Ripped My Stick 2:50
12. Letter From Hawaii 2:13
13. The Surfmen 3:27
14. Can't Get a Tan 2:44
15. The Surf Instructor 3:55
16. Punch Out at Malibu 1:58
17. Bird Bathroom 1:41

Album Rating (1-10): 6.0

Members & Other Bands:

• Dennis Dragon - Drums, Vox, Percussion, Producer, Engineer (Beach Boys, Byrds, Neil young, Rick Springfield, Captain & Tennille, Farm, Joyous Noise, Protein Bros, Dragons, Marc McClure, Ron Elliott, Heavenz, Scott Goddard, Eliminators, Royal Philharmonic Orch, DJ Food & DK, Apokaful, )
• Drew Steele - Guitars, Vox, Synth, Keys (Crowbar Salvation, Scott Goddard)
• Johnny Malibu - - Guitar, Vox
• Richard Arrindell - Photos
• Rat (Tommy Steele) - Art
• John Hunt - Bass
• Spino Urchin - Guitar
• Jeff Ray Ban Eyrich- Bass (Roadrunners)
• Jo Hansch - Mastering
• The Hulk - Harmonica, Guitar

Unknown-ness: Never heard of the Surf Punks. Just having listened to the Surf MC's, i can't help but feel this will be another terrible niche version of a particular musical genre. Where the MC's were bad hip hop, this, I fear will get bogged down at trying to fit all the surf vernacular into short punk songs...maybe it will be surprisingly good?

Album Review: As the music is, it is not very punk rock...it is silly, short, and eccentric at times, but it does not embody the sound or spirit of punk. It is kinda close to the Ramones at times, particularly on the power-pop-punk "Teenage Girl," and the song "My Wave" has a great punk bass line, but the majority is flawed. They also use a lot of surfing jargon like tubes for waves, stick for surf board, and they mention beaches and girls an awful lot...one song is all about a largely endowed woman walking on the beach. They also have a song about not being able to  get a tan- a trait shared with the other surf themed band, Surf MCs. 

It is a long album full of short songs, and most of the tracks were previously released before they got signed to CBS/Epic on Shelter Records. Dennis Dragon basically put the whole thing together being drummer, singer, engineer and producer. The two punk kids came from rather established entertainment families. Dragon's dad was a symphony conductor, and his brother was Captain in Captain & Tennille. Steele's step dad was Gavin MacLeod: McHale's Navy, Mary Tyler Moore, Love Boat. They apparently had a wild live show and were locally loved. They started in 76, and self released their first album, which was re-released with bonus tracks via Epic in 1980.

Stand Out Track: Teenage Girls, My Wave

Links:
Spotify full album

Wiki

Discogs

Allmusic

Facebook

riff relevant

pop matters

imdb

Dragon's Obit 2017

Why it Matters

Encyclopedia of Surfing

Logo'ed Surf Shorts

Pheromones (the) - Collateral Damage

Name: The Pheromones
Album: Collateral Damage
Year: 1988
Style: Comedic Pop, Novelty, Folk, Electronic
Similar Bands: Weird Al, Frank De Lima & Na Kolohe
"One-Word" Review: Embarrassing eclectic joke-songs
Based Out Of: Washington DC
Label: Skyclad

 Cover & Record

Record & Back

Collateral Damage (1988)

1. Attaboy 3:08
2. Too Smart to Have Fun 2:56
3. Closet Skeleton 4:02
4. Hey Look Around You 2:37
5. Campaign '88 3:06
6. If I Were Your Prezident  3:15 /
7. Galactic Funny Farm 4:11
8. Space in the World 1:37
9. Ancient One 4:45
10. Mad Elaine 2:44
11. Come & Unite Me Tonight 3:41
12. Yuppie Drone II 3:27
13. Tiki Goes Mad 1:14

Album Rating (1-10): 3.0

Members & Other Bands:

• Jimmy (Patterson) Pheromone -Writing & Programming
• Alvis (Johnson) Pheromone - Writing & Performance
• Mary Von Klotz
• Melcor Shaazendis - Producer
• J.B. Daws - Engineer
• Hank Rand -Arrangements
• Alan Sonneman - Cover Art
• Elliott Landy - Back Photo
• New Age Graphics - Design & Graphics
• Letterforms - Typography

Unknown-ness: Never heard of this band, but I like the pink & black color scheme, and the font of the album title gives a little of a punk/alternative vibe.

Album Review: This album is terrible. Very awkward and embarrassing style attempts with cringe-worthy lyrics and dated jests. The one stand out track "Too Smart to Have Fun" has a good melody, and is not a horrible song, and the Campaign-Prezident (ugh, the "z") suite has some interesting ideas and concepts about running & voting for a 3rd party candidate. Those two points gave the album an extra point on its rating. The synth / drum machine effects on Attaboy and Yuppie Drone are just horrendous Devo and rap style parodies respectively (although "Attaboy" has a solid They Might Be Giants worthy lyric "Here at the "department of redundancy" department). The worst Weird Al songs are leagues ahead of anything on this album. Makes a little more sense that they were on Dr. Demento.

Stand Out Track: Too Smart to Have Fun

Links:
Discogs
Get Hip re-release label
rate your music
Washington Post article '88

Frank DeLima & Na Kolohe - Don't Sneeze When You Eat Saimin - Live @ the Noodle Shop!

Name: Frank DeLima & Na Kolohe
Album: Don't Sneeze When You Eat Saimin
Year: 1981
Style: Comedy
Similar Bands: Juvinile Comedy
"One-Word" Review: Localized-Hawaiian-Meh-Humor
Based Out Of: Honolulu, Hawaii (The Noodle Shop Waikiki Sand Vila Hotel)
Label: Pocholinga Productions

Don't Sneeze...cover
Don't Sneeze...back

Don't Sneeze When You Eat Saimin (1981)

1. The Meanist Paniolo Palolo Ever Had 3:54
2. The Lexography of Non-Local Locution 6:38
3. Sashimi Street 6:24
4. Don't Sneeze When You Eat Saimin 2:42/
5. Lucille 4:58
6. Island Airwaves 3:48
7. Pakes 1:36
8. Babooze 5:46
9. The Japanese 0:40
10. The King of the Jungle 1:00

Album Rating (1-10):
2.0

Members & Other Bands:
Frank DeLima - Writer, Producer, Ukulele
Partick Downes - Writer, Music & Lyrics, Cover Design, Graphics, Recording & General Editing, Snapshots
Dean Shimabukuro - Writer, Guitar
Dean Lum - Writer, Bass, Recorded
John Chang - Touch-Up & Final Editing
Ray Tanaka - Cover Photo

Unknown-ness: I had seen this record at the thrift shop where I volunteer time organizing their records. And I re-shelved the album many times into 1982, not giving it much thought. Eventually I picked it up and looked at it. From the title and front picture it seemed very silly, but it might be a interesting record from the early 80's. I figured "Live @ The Noodle Shop" would mean it was a live record, so it would have a good energy. The image on the back is a collage of different clippings and pictures, adding more to the chaotic feel of good 80's albums.

Album Review: Little did I know or anticipate that this would be a comedy record from Hawaii. So it will be a little different to review an album that is not music. The album starts off with a dated and localized jokes. The first track is a joke-song is a tale of a Portuguese tough guy from Palolo. The joke is that he’s not tough at all. All his toughness examples are either on a small scale or sound like they should be tough, but are pleasant. The second track is an audience participation sing song joke, making fun of local dialect & jargon. Some of the audience response is unintelligible, but the jokes are lost on outsiders anyway. These are inside jokes, where Hawaii is on the inside. The bit ends with a joke about why your ass crack (or the local word for it) is the direction it is: if you slip down the steps, you don’t go (lip-flapping sound). The audience seemed to like it. The sections are broken up with fade-ins and fade-outs, making each joke seem prepared, and staged, rather than a non-stop live performance. After speaking in Japanese for a bit, the next joke is introduced as an educational program translating numbers in Japanese. He invites Animal from the Muppet Show on stage to assist in the joke, only to be greeted by a poorly parodied Kermit first. Animal is obviously fooled naively, as he only knows English: one = itchy, two = knee, three = sun, four = she, five = go, and it falls apart from there as it is supposed to. The next is one of Frank De Lima’s most famous bits, “Don’t Sneeze When you Eat Saimin.” As you can guess, it tells what will if you sneeze while eating noodles. It delves into other dishes too. It is very juvenile in its sense of humor. “Lucille” is another song-parody about a girl leaving our narrator. After one stanza, it is announced that the song was written by Kenny Rodgers, written about a couple he saw in Hawaii. So Frank re-writes the story, as it must have originally occurred in Hawaii, before Kenny transcribed it for mainlanders to understand. “Island Airwaves” is a sample mockery of the radio stations they have in Hawaii. It has little musical examples and talk sections with all their idiosyncrasies explored. “Pakes” is an informational comedic explanation of racial slurs in Hawaii. But the jokes are still comical and tame in their tone. “Babooze” is about being a Portagee: “Hawaiian term for Portuguese.” Basically, they are just stupid jokes, with the Portagee input as the idiot, intermixed with a drinking melody reciting of Ba-Ba-Ba-Babooze. Again, the crowd seems to take to these jokes very well. “Japanese” is a very short information giving lessons explaining more Japanese words and stereotypes. “King of the Jungle” is just a joke recited without music. Basically these are all just acoustic silly songs, revolving around Hawaiian humor and Hawaiian stereotypes. It is nothing to really write home about, so I’ll just stop there.

Stand Out Track:
Don't Sneeze When You Eat Saimin

Links:
Frank DeLima - allmusic
Frank DeLima - myspace
Frank DeLima - Wikipedia
Frank DeLima - website
Frank DeLima - interview Hawaii 411
Frank DeLima - Honolulu Star Bulletin song
Frank DeLima - Honolulu Star Bulletin 25th Anniv
Frank DeLima - Short Bio
Frank DeLima - Buy Hawaiian Music
Frank DeLima - 2004 Interview acidlogic
Frank DeLima - Bio Booklines Hawaii
Frank DeLima - Making a Difference
Frank DeLima - Best Na Hoku HanoHano Comedy Album 1982